To paraphrase Abraham Lincoln: You can enjoy some of your guests, all of the time, and all of your guests some of the time, but you cannot enjoy all of your guests all of the time. For those less enjoyable moments, your fellow innkeepers offer the following advice.

After an early morning encounter with a bear in the garden, a fellow innkeeper presented me with a great T-shirt, although I rarely wear it when guests are around. The picture on the shirt shows several bears holding bones. Underneath is the inscription, “Send More Tourists. We Really Liked the Last Ones.” Ellen Gutman Chenaux, Birchwood Inn, Lenox, MA

1. No Whining
2. Just be glad Martha Stewart Isn't Your Mother-in-Law

Our favorite is, "They come, they stay, they pay, hooray"! Jody Schmoll & Dennis Hayden, Blue Harbor House, Camden, ME

Seen needlepointed on a pillow: “Never Mistake Endurance for Hospitality." Janet Buck, Dr. Dodson House B&B, St. Michaels, MD.

My personal favorite was a doormat a wacky long-time guest house operator had at her front door: "We Love Our Guests. Some Make Us Happy By Coming, Others By Going." Joan Wells, Queen Victoria, Cape May, NJ

When we started innkeeping, friends gave us a sign reading: “If you are grouchy, irritable or just plain mean there will be a $10 charge for putting up with you". We hung it just inside our front door. Brings lots of laughs from guests as they check in. Jan Newton, Baltimore Street B&B, Gettysburg, PA

I saw a sign in a country craft store that I liked but didn't have the nerve to buy. It read: "Quityerbellyakin!" Lois Hoover, Su Casa B&B, Kansas City, Missouri

Consumer travel is poised for a comeback, according to a recent American Express Leisure Travel Survey. Some facts mentioned in the report:

“More than half (54 percent) of survey respondents say they plan to travel at least as much this year as last year, and another 25 percent expect to travel more; only 19 percent will travel less.

On average, travelers expect to spend $2,031 on airfare, accommodations, sightseeing, meals, souvenirs and other expenses for vacations of five or more days -- seven percent less than in 2001.

Almost half of all travelers (48.2%) said they will wait until the last minute to book their vacation plans.

The Internet continues to make gains as a preferred tool for planning and booking leisure travel. Thirty-five percent of Americans say they will use the Internet to plan their vacation this year compared to 29 percent in 2001.

Americans are also embracing short, weekend getaways. Sixty-three percent of survey respondents say they are planning a weekend getaway this year, and the average number of weekend trips will be four, up from three in 2001.

Leisure travel season will peak in July, when 41 percent of Americans will travel; 29 percent of those surveyed will travel in August. The shoulder seasons are also popular: 16 percent planned trips for May, 14 percent will travel in September, and 11 percent will travel in October. Winter vacations are as popular this year as last: 11 percent will travel in December, the same as last year.

Consistent with last year’s findings, most Americans (61 percent) will travel by car this year, similar to 65 percent in 2001. Forty-four percent of vacationers plan to fly this year, on par with 46 percent who flew last year.

Travelers this year are likely to continue to travel domestically and internationally in roughly the same numbers as last year. Twelve percent of survey respondents say they will travel internationally this year, compared to 14 percent in 2001.

When asked how they will pay for their vacations, respondents indicated that credit cards remain the most popular form of payment for airfare (54 percent), hotels (58 percent) and car rentals (55 percent).“

More details American Express Leisure Travel Survey

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